Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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