Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
