her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
