I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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