all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
