doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just invented taco cereal.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
