so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
