It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
