Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
