Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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