to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize