i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
