Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize