everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
