Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
