butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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