Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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