Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
