Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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