I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
