i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
They took my balls.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
