i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
