Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
