my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
