Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
