benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize