He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
