Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
