in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
