Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
