If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
