i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
operation have a gay friend backfired
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
