brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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