After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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