I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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