This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
