Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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