In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
It's shark week go big or go home
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
