she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
