so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I have aggressive nipples.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize