And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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