Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
