I wanna bring you to show and tell
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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