Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
