i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize