What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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