I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize