we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
