you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
