i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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