first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize