that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
