tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
